Thu May 17, 2007
If you arrive at an orgy in full swing with a handful of individually-wrapped Pleasure Wipes and Cum-Kleen Wipes to share, you will be everyone’s new best friend, I guarantee it.
Don’t ask me how I know this. You’ll just have to take my word for it.
Cum-Kleen Wipes and Pleasure Wipes are designed to help you clean up before or after a sexual experience. Both types of wipes are available in mango and vanilla scents; Pleasure Wipes also come in a strawberry scent. All varieties are alcohol-free and contain soothing aloe vera. You can purchase them individually wrapped or in tubs.
So far as I can tell, the only difference between Pleasure Wipes and Cum-Kleen Wipes is in the packaging. Using an image of satiny swirls on the package, Pleasure Wipes seem to appeal to someone seeking the sensual side of sex. Cum-Kleen Wipes, bearing a squirting cartoon cock on the package, would probably catch the eye of someone hoping for a more down-and-dirty experience.
“But what’s wrong with hopping in the shower? Or using a damp towel? Or tissues? Or baby wipes?” I can hear you asking. Let’s face it–there aren’t always showers in the locations we choose for sex. Do you really want greasy lube, ejaculate or other products of sex (*cough*santorum*cough*) on your bath towels? Tissues are fine for a quick clean up, unless you’re heading back in for round two; no one wants to lick tissue bits off their lover’s coochie. Baby wipes are okay in a pinch, but GS Wipes do have some great characteristics that baby wipes lack.
First, GS Wipes are significantly larger. Both measure in at 8″ x 9,” about 1/3 larger than standard baby wipes. They are also quite thick and a bit stretchy, which is good for getting into all your crevices and creases. Unless you are terribly messy, one wipe should do the trick for you. The wipes’ scent is nice as well, and you won’t have to smell like an infant while you are playing.
GS Wipes also distributes a cute kit named “Rendezvous” which contains necessities for your impromptu or not-so-impromptu assignation. In a small, tasteful red box, you’ll get a pair of Pleasure Wipes, breath mints, lube sachets and condoms. It’s a classy kit; I’m glad to see a product like this that doesn’t have a cutesy or sexist name.
At an orgy, these wipes would be perfect. During a sexy weekend spent at an upscale hotel (where you didn’t want to besmirch the lovely towels), the wipes would be a godsend. If you lover is wont to call in the middle of the work day requesting a rendezvous in the car-park next to your office building, you’d better keep a couple in your desk drawer.
Because like the scouts say, you should always be prepared.
Available through GSWipes.com
$8.99/tub of 25