October 12th

I just read Jane's entry of yesterday and I'm having a similar weekend. Some chores, some laziness, some getting re-oriented to the changing seasons. There was an Erotic City [sex oriented party] Friday night and the usual Saturday evening pansexual BDSM party and I just flipped a coin each evening and decided to stay home, do some website reviews, work on what I'm eating, resting, and catching up on mondo DVD's.

I know I've mused a bit about this diet project, but let me spend a Sunday afternoon discussing it.

I'm still getting slowly started on the Atkins diet that Shawn has lost over 30 pounds on. She and Deco live together and are both on the same diet, so they are mutually supportive which is a very important strength for them both. I have their support, and also on 3WA have found that there is a forum - special access must be requested, to give additional privacy - purely for those of us working our weight down. I begged access and did a couple of posts and already have people giving me online support, which was one of my strengths when I quit smoking 12 years ago.

I've even chatted amiably and productively with my to the right-of-Ghengis-Khan brother-in-law, who has used Atkins productively in the past, and exchanged cell numbers to be of support.

Now, I've had very loving friends express cautions about what I'm starting. I love them more for attempting to keep me from hurting myself. Please trust that I've been a True Believer in the past and lost several years of my life to a cult of which I will never name or discuss any further online. My determination to avoid another True Believer situation whether dietary, religious, political, or whatever is as strong as is my determinism to avoid smoking again. My determination to lose weight now is of similar fiber.

What I'm looking to do is to lose 60-80 pounds in order to save my life. No dramatics - simple truth, with both real fear and honest resolve.

What I'm also looking for is probably two stages - one being a drastic 6 months to a year program to lose, and the second being a sane and functional segue to a long term maintenance diet, exercise, and lifestyle. I was able to quit the corporate world at age 40 and succeed at nursing school, and I was able to quit smoking after 2-3 packs per day for 19 years. I AM capable of making change in my life. It's just harder than finding tits on ducks. Almost.

At 265 pounds, with terrible orthopedics [drastically worsening degenerative lumbosacral arthrosis, two bad ankles and two bad knees] I cannot exercise right now because the pain is sufficient to overwhelm my good intentions. I have a hard time walking the length of the mall or standing 15 minutes in the kitchen without pain. Hopefully - and I've picked 230 out of the air - with some weight loss I'll be able to start exercise in a manner that is sustainable. Thirty pounds is about 40% of the weight I'd like to lose.

I don't own a scale - I will buy one before too long, I'm sure, but none right now. I don't plan on micro managing the numbers, although I'd like to acknowledge landmarks. I think the opportunity to buy new clothes or to fit into the stuff that I've been intending to send to the thrift store will be as gratifying as the numbers themselves.

I welcome both encouragement with my diet and personal stories of caution, as long as all are supportive of my effort. The Blue Blazer Regulars have never failed me up til now and I am in constant appreciation of the great feedback I get from this journal.

By the way, fellow Seattlites, Seattle Super Supplements has all Atkins brand products at 30% off, including the books.

I'm looking to make a good life even better, and to make it a much longer run into the future. I appreciate your joining the ride.


  • The Usuals ==

  • Latest Book: Just finished two - Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
  • and Robert Parker's Shrink Rap

  • Last Tshirt Worn: from a dancer's club, The Great Alaskan Bush Company
  • Last DVD watched: Several - Hudson Hawk, a perennial favorite and fuck the critics; Tigerland; Spun - you have to see Mena Suvari as a tweaked out junkie; X-Files again; Dirty Rotten Scoundrels - comfort food of a movie; Ghostbusters; The Italian Job - the remake and not Michael Caine, but ok by itself; and both Deacons for Defense and Normal -both very painful and thoughtful movies, well worth watching.

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