March 17th, 2000

Panther just left, having done her damage.

The ceiling fixer guy, a couple hours late yesterday but a nice guy, did a good job on much of the work, was due back this morning "I'll be there between 8 and 8:30" to paint and install the light fixture. At 9:30am I left a note on the door, "Went to bed at 9:30am; come on in and finish your work". I scribbled it on the bottom of his "8:30am" note.... When I awoke this afternoon, of course, the note was still there, and a number was showing on my beeper to call him... a number with one too few digits. And they wonder why I have hypertension.

Sooo, after waking up around 1:30pm I should have cleaned the house prior to Panther's arrival for our dinner and a video and a snuggle date. Nah - cruised smut instead. Not really proud of what I got done, no reviews to brag of, just a bunch of decadence wallowed in. One highlight was email from my son, who is coming over for dinner tomorrow, and he dropped the bombshell that he had just gotten hired to work at The Evil Empire. [For those readers not from either the software industry or the Puget Sound area, 'The Evil Empire' is the Redmond campus that made Uncle Bill the richest man in the world]. After several years doing tech support for a couple of Internet providers ["Hello? Tech Support? Is this the Internet?"], he was about fried on dealing with some of the mouth breathers he had to be polite to. Good for him.

I also down loaded a share ware program to categorize all my videos, and loaded them all into the listing. I have too many tapes out on long term loan to friends. I watch a lot of them while on my late night net surfings, the curse of a multiplexing brain. My family, growing up during the Ozzie and Harriet years, would watch TV, listen to music, each read a book, and carry on a couple conversations, all simultaneously. Weird, but it was home, and prepared me for later in life when I worked in a busy psych ward. Some of the patients there could broadcast all those channels by themselves! After years of using a PC only as a device to trade email and to reach out to the smut centers of the universe, it felt fairly productive to do such a simple inventory.

Got a call from a friend, from the community. "Uh, if a guy happened to have a straight razor and accidentally cut himself like this'n'that, ....". Sure, come on over. I took a look at it, told him he does need stitches and a tetanus shot. Threw a pressure dressing on it and chatted with him til he was a bit less pale and shocky [exploring wounds can do that for some damn reason], and sent him on to the local doc-in-a-box. I like being a community resource, like helping friends with stuff like that, and frankly I enjoy doing the simple tasks of first aid. Bodies are neat, and even more fun to see the inside of than on the outside. To protect myself, since I do actually work in the field, I tend to err on the side of conservative.

Hmmm. Looks like I did end up getting more done than just wallow in smut.

Anyhow, Panther arrived and we headed right back out for chinese carry out. Had to be carry out - the restaurant does great food but it's a nicotine cloud inside from their bar and I've never been able to eat there. Watched "American Pie" on video which she'd never seen before, and which is full of just great sophomoric potty joke level humor. Coming of age and getting laid kinda stuff, universal issues.

We had a real nice sensual interlude then, on a couple levels. First, for several reasons I've been confining myself to (a) topping 99% of the time and (b) doing more sexual surrogate activities than purely vanilla sex. 'A' stems to a large degree from trust issues, a couple years after a bad relationship breakup. 'B' is deeper, involving the Bob Dole Issue as well as my continually expanding alternative tastes. Ten years or so on blood pressure meds and after a long active adult sluthood I've really had to adjust to a changing body. I used to be a cowboy in the saddle, hundreds of partners, as many as 8-10 in a night at some orgies, and I'd get hard and stay hard forever. Now I'll often find a woody changing to spaghetti right in mid yippie-kay-yay, despite desire, motivation, the moment, the help of the partner, all of it. Rather disheartening, and it does tend to make one more inclined to offer a partner a good fisting or flogging, just to avoid that disappointingly limp moment. Panther is one of those understanding people who, like myself, really enjoys watching her partner enjoy him/herself. She gave me a nice long massage [jealous cat snuggled into my armpit and purring defensively at Panther], and when she began playing with my dillywhacker I mentioned that I had intended to try taking some Viagra the doc had given me, but it takes 30-60 minutes to take effect. Her response? "I'd love to play with your limp dick for an hour!" Well, folks, the stuff really works. I allowed myself to lay back and be a do-me queen, and it was marvelous. I highly recommend it. Tomorrow night I'm scheduled to be a DM most of the night, also do a spanking, and to help with a flogging, I'm not sure what all else. All Big Bad Toppish stuff, but inside I'll know that I'm the same fellow who rolled around on the bed, eyes shut, flopping about quasi-epileptically, absolutely incapable of verbal effort, physically spent and emotionally a limp rag, all at the tender mercies of a young lady with the inclination to please.

Oh, yeah. Life is good.

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